Devotion
by Accidentally The Whole Fanfic
Summary: One can't help but fall deeply in love with such a divine, gentle creature.


Devotion

* * *

At last... I'd finally met her. Her beauty, grace, the compassion in her eyes, the sheer force of eons of wisdom radiating in a soft rainbow halo from her body... such a long wait had truly been worth the reward of simply being in her presence.

"I admire your devotion beyond mere words," she said softly, touching my forehead as a mother might - gentle, affectionate. "You truly do have a good and loyal heart."

My breath caught in my throat, and my eyes welled up with tears. I had no idea how to respond. My mind spun wildly as I tried to keep a firm grasp on the reason I had come to see her - had even chanced the possibility.

"I don't know how to say to you all that I want to say," I began, my voice hitching. "The times my faith wavered... wondering how to find you, what I'd say, what I'd do when it finally happened... wondering if I was worthy, if _anyone_ was worthy..."

"You love me," she answered simply. "As I love all of my children of this Earth... perhaps more..."

She knew. But, of course, she would know. How could she not? Her heart, her mind... far more powerful forces than mere mortal minds such as mine could even attempt to understand. "I do love you... more than I can express..."

I reached into my pocket and drew out a blue feather.

"...But perhaps this can..."

Silence. My hand trembled. I didn't even dare gaze upon her in that moment, fear and hope coursing in a jumbled race through my veins.

She finally spoke:

"Do you really believe you can handle such a union?" Not teasing. Not outraged. Not condescending. Concerned. Simply concerned, and...

"I believe so. Yes."

She drew in a sigh. "You wish to believe so. Wishes alone, I'm afraid, cannot make it so."

__

Please don't say this.

"You'll be very lonely... I can't always be there..."

"I can handle it!" I pleaded, feeling desperation creep over my skin now. "My devotion hasn't wavered all this time!"

"You nearly let go of your faith and almost gave up a few times," she reminded me, her truth ramming daggers deep into my heart. "I do not condemn you for this... I simply remind you so that you may see..."

"I've grown!" I shook my head, tears beginning to sting my eyes now. "I... I can deal with more than what I could in the past!"

"You must let go and find love with a mortal, someone who can share their time with you," she said calmly, brushing the tears from my eyes. "Such heavy devotion to me can only provoke strain with time... when I have so many responsibilities to tend to..."

"You think I don't understand that?" I snapped, my voice thick. I knew the battle was lost, but I continued on, regardless. "I know you have responsibilities, we _all_ have them! I love you! I understand your duties, I understand... everything! Do you think I'd have asked you to marry me if I couldn't take it?"

"Yes." That infuriatingly calm voice... I wanted to rip it from her throat! "Your love, your devotion for me is so strong... I can feel it rushing off of you in waves. But it has led you to believe that you can handle anything... everything... you are, after all, only human."

"_I know that!_"

"Please forgive me. But... I cannot accept your feather. I bid you good fortune, for I know true love will find its way to you in time. Keep that feather for that day. I'm very sorry, Claire..."

She vanished.

__

My true love is you... we'll find our way to each other. I'll make you find your way to me... you can't escape me. I've come so far, you won't escape me!

I threw myself into the spring, desperate to be with her somehow, to take myself to her. The water rushed into my lungs, even as I coughed and gagged and fought to keep myself from coming up for air. _Just a little more... just a little more!_

It was time.

As the life faded from my body, the feather drifted quietly down to float and bob on the rippling surface. My final proposal.

I would have her for eternity...

* * *

I'm sure I'll write _something_ that has a happy ending someday.


End file.
